Nel glanced at Apache and then away again in the universal gesture of badly feigned innocence. Ignis was handsome, and charming, and he cooked, and cleaned, and sounded like a toff, and if it turned out that he could handle a riding crop as well as he could cook, Nel would be forced to marry him.

She finished one of her last mouthfuls and leaned in towards Apache to whisper, "I think he plays for Szayel's team."

All the best ones did. It wasn't fair.